Some ways to annoy Nightmare
by Angel-Pie111
Summary: Well, Nightmare has nerves too, right?
1. A few ways

A few ways to annoy Nightmare from Soul Calibur  
1. ask if he is related to Meta Night.  
2. Tell him that you think Siegfried is the poster boy for soul calibur.  
3. Hug him from behind in public.  
4. When he asks you to get off, say that your hair is stuck between his armor.  
5. Tell people that he is your bunny boy.  
6. ask to play with his armor and take it before he answers.  
7. put candles around him and sing Avril Lavigne and Linkin Park songs at random.  
8. Tell him that you invited Siegfried over for a tea party and he's bringing miniature sugar cookies.  
9. Go to his house and play the german version of barbie girl, tell him that he sounds just like Ken.  
10. Whenever you go to his house, watch Two and a Half men with the volume on high.  
11. When he threatens to kill you, say "Isn't that nice." And put on an innocent smile.  
12. Say that you think he ripped of his moves from Siegfried.  
13. If he ever tries to use the soul blade around you, hit him in the back of the head and say "Bad Nightmare!"  
14. (I'm running out fast!!) Ask if he owns a toothbrush, but then say never mind and hurry off.  
15. Finally, appologize for all of it and say he is an extremely nice person.


	2. Me & Nightmare

Nightmare was so much harder to annoy- by normal means that is.

So in other words he'd sit there and let me bleed or starve to death.

_No Mcdonalds or Head injuries._

And to top it all off I was still kind of gun-shy after what happened with soul edge and I. Trust me, having evil spirits follow you around is terrible for your social life. I mean horrible.

"So Nightmare-"

"No."

Well then, that wasn't very nice...

"I'm in no mood for your annoyance, Alexis."

"Speaking of being in no mood, I wonder what Raphael's...Wait... Did you just address me by my first name?"

"Yeah, what of it?"

Nightmare does not address me by my first name unless he is given permission to do so.

"Excuse me, I'm going to go find something blunt to strike you with."

Nightmare was unscathed, but when I tell him something, I mean it. And just a few minutes later I found something blunt... And it just so happens I also found my Boo-bah Fanna.

"What is that?''

"That is a bat, and this is a Boo-bah."

"A what?"

"A Boo-bah. Her name is Billywilly Bo Willybananafanna Fo Filly. Or Fanna for short. Now stay still."

"What do you plan to-"

I made one of those Indian-like hunting noises while lifting the bat and hitting him over the head with it. Unfortunately, Nightmare is always wearing a stronger-than-wood metal helmet.

"What the fu-"

"THAT'S A BAD WORD!"

"What?...Okay, what the fudge."

"Thank you, continue."

"Why did you-!"

"Let's go visit Raphael!"

"NO! You just hit me with a friggin' bat!"

"_**WE ARE GOING TO Raphael's HOUSE RIGHT NOW**_."

I used my most demanding voice, hence the bold and italic letters. He froze for a moment, but I already knew he would have to say yes.

"Thank you bunny boy."

"I hate you so much."

"Smiley faces!"

"...Okay let's go."

It only took a few minutes to get to Raphael's house, don't ask me where it is 'cause I really don't exactly where it is. Like, right past that place with that one dude but next to that store with that one sale. But don't go too far.

Anyway, when we actually got there the door was wide open, which would be considered pretty suspicious if you're not me.

"Uh, I don't think we should go in here. It looks like something hapened."

"You spelled happened wrong."

"What?"

"We're going in, that's what. Now c'mon!"

I walked in-stepping over an overturned table- then went upstairs where I somehow knew Raphael's room would be. There was alot of noise coming from his room and-

Heyyyy- I'm going to conveniently mention that I haven't seen Siegfried all day. Yeah.

Soooooo, I went up to the door and -after ruling out knocking, of course- opened up.

Then froze.

Nightmare wasn't too far behind, and when he saw what I was looking at, he froze too.

"Holy smex..."

"Shield your eyes Alexis!"

"There you go using my name again! Y'know if I had my bat-."

He grabbed my arm and drug me off before I finished. When we got to the nearest burger king I had finally taken in the shock of what I'd just seen.

"This is horrible."

I said before taking another sip of my milkshake (oh that's right, they don't like me here.)

"I know, I had no idea that Siegfried and Raphael were-"

"No! I meant that I didn't have my phone with me! I could have taken pictures! Or, no, videos! I mean I had no idea Siegfried was an uke! You think maybe that's just on Sundays or something?"

"I was trying not to think of it too much, I hate the guy you know...But...yesIthinkthat'sjustonsundays."

He looked out the window and took a sip of his drink. I knew he'd agree again.

Well, gotta go get my phone,

Byeeee~


End file.
